Farewell Australia

With Starbucks and froyo back in my routine, it's official that I have returned to life in Chapel Hill. When I'm not sleeping through all hours of the day trying to get over my jet lag, I am typically mourning the fact that I can't walk outside onto the world's best beaches. In fact, I can't walk outdoors without a parka on at this point because it is so frigid. Gotta love being back.

That being said, this last post is just a general collection of thoughts and observations I have collected after my time abroad.  

To start off with, there are many reasons why I would strongly recommend studying abroad in Aus: 

 1. Being exposed to a new culture and actually having the chance to live among a foreign group of people teaches you invaluable life lessons. Like don't drink too many wet pussy shots or you will end up in the hospital. I have also come to appreciate the fact that Australians really do seem to be the friendliest people in the world.

2. As I sat and people watched in the airport today- this next point has only been confirmed: Australians are very easy on the eyes compared to Americans. Part of this definitely has to do with the fact that even if someone is lacking natural beauty in Aus, they will at least assemble a decent outfit when facing the general public. Many have also dragged a comb through their hair in the past 24 hours. Dress for success people. Or at least try not to look homeless. 

3. The fact that I have had an entirely new city at my disposal means that I haven't had to ask myself "Should I go to DKE, Bobs, or He's Not Saturday night?" for the past 5 months. If that's not refreshing- then I don't know what is.

4. Homework didn't really seem part of the educational culture. See example given below:

Me: Hey professor, I am traveling to the Whitsunday's for spring break and will miss our quiz. Is there any way I can make it up or take it before I leave?

Professor: Quiz? Why would my class get in the way of your travels. Just go, I don't care about the quiz. 

Me: Blank faced stare back while in complete and utter disbelief at response

 which translates to the next point... 

5. Life has been a beach- what more could you ask for? 

6. If you are a baby like me- life without ALE ain't so bad either.    

Section 2- adjustment to life back in the US

1. To support myself through the depression I knew was bound to happen upon my return to the US, I hoarded approximately 8 packages of Tim Tams, and proceeded to sneak them into the country. Whenever I am missing Australia, at least I will have their fabulous chocolate. Together we will get through this. 

2. Hallelujah. DRYERS!! 

3. Being able to walk outdoors and not face imminent death from wildlife at every turn is somewhat refreshing. Also, I can't say that I miss having birds the size of small dogs trying to come steal my food. 

Aus's version of a squirrel running around campus...

  4. People dressed to impress for class in Australia. I'm talking hair done, cute dresses, and if you were really intense, maybe some heels. Having adjusted to this expectation, I have been walking around Chapel Hill in cute dresses and skirts only to realize that I look like I'm ready to go out compared to everyone in leggings and a hoodie. Actually utilizing my grossly large wardrobe instead of just staring at it as I throw on the same sweatshirt and shorts for class is a change that might actually stick around. Watch out UNC- I'm actually going to look like a girl for class. 

5. Given that I'm a princess and love attention, not having an accent is kind of the worst. 

All in all, living in Australia has been the most amazing 5 months. I didn't get to say goodbye to everyone I would have liked to because I was only back in Brisbane for 1 day before my departure, but I definitely have to thank the sailing team, Quest, and Kings College for making Aus such a great experience for me. This blog has attempted to keep you all up to date with my doings, however there is no way I could have included the full extent of how great it was/everything I did. I'll include a few more pictures at the end, and as usual, hope you all enjoy. 

Sunset over Byron Bay

Australian Football League game (weird mix b/w soccer and rugby)

Brisbane at night

Pictures of the Whitsunday's never get old

Blue mountains pretty amazing  

Classic Sydney Picture

More large fish I let within my vicinity

  -F

The time I got hazed in the tropics

 One of the best things that I feel going abroad has given me is the opportunity to meet a variety of people who I would never have encountered otherwise. One of these people is a guy I met in one of my classes named Az Gallagher.

Meet Az

Az grew up in a fairly rural part of Australia called Innisfail, Queensland. His mom's side of the family are commercial fishermen and his dad's side owns one of the largest banana plantations in Australia. After years of stereotyping Australians due to being an avid Steve Irwin fan, I had finally met the croc-hunting jungle-loving Aussie I had spent so many years envisioning.

To put things in perspective: On a Saturday morning, you can find me sipping my caramel machiatto and writing, which is something that yes, I do for fun. In contrast, Az is more than likely out in the middle of the ocean spearing 20 pound fish and catching more lobster than you would even know what to do with. His all too Australian lifestyle has even landed him a TV series with his friend Jack. The series captures the various ridiculous things they do across the country such as swimming with whales, putting their lives in danger on the reg, and catching monster-sized fish.

When I had a free week at the end of my time in Australia, Az was nice enough to invite me up to his house in Innisfail. He and his family were excited to show me what life was like for them up in the tropics.

Our journey started out with a 20 hour car trip from Brisbane to Innisfail with me, Az, and his mother Tracey who flew down to help us with the drive up. I was really hoping his mom and I were going to get along seeing as we were going to practically be sitting on top of one another in the front of an un-airconditioned car for the next 20 hours, but turns out I needn't have worried. You automatically have a special bond with someone after having to pee on the side of the road together because Az declared a spare patch of grass he found a good enough restroom for his female companions. The 18 wheelers were real fans of ours.

5 AM Departure

Fortunately, after only approximately 3 break-down scares, we made it to Innisfail. 

A brief reflection: Up until this point, I liked to think of myself as a decently outdoorsy girl. I enjoy hiking, taking long scenic walks through the forest and along the beach, and I've even found myself on top of a mountain or two.

Flash forward to my week in Innisfail: I am sitting in a boat in the middle of the Great Barrier Reef, there is a 20 pound dead fish spewing blood at my feet as I'm huddled in a corner of the boat farthest away from the fish, all while watching Az's brother rip a lobster's head off. I was considering jumping in and snorkeling until Az's grandfather earlier that morning had made sure to inform me that the sharks prefer female meat, and that the American ones were usually the unluckiest. 

This being said, all images of me basking on a beach tanning to the point of ethnic change died with the fish's last flop. Adventurous outdoorsy me turned into a suburban princess as nature became all too real.

Honestly, why do you keep staring at me

My week was characterized by moments like these as I got a taste of what life was like for the real outdoorsman of the world. The Gallagher's had every fruit you could ever hope for growing in their backyard, along with chickens that provided fresh eggs every day. Most meals were freshly caught and picked, which was fortunate for me because I quickly lost the few pounds my discovery of Australian chocolate had put on.

The only other major princess incident I dealt with consisted of the internal freakouts that ensued during my visit to the banana plantation. Innisfail's croc population has apparently exploded, so this knowledge mixed with the fact that half of the animals on the continent are deadly made it so that I was convinced I was going to get bitten or eaten at every turn. I was in a constant state of padding down my body to check for any rogue insects or tics that could have landed on me from the trees, grass, and general nature surrounding me. I additionally did routine poison Ivy checks even though they literally don't have it in Northern Queensland. 

I was doing a pretty good job at keeping my cool at least outwardly until gravity brought me down  and I face planted on some slippery wet rocks by a stream. At this point, I spiraled into a series of internal self diagnoses consisting of about 10 different infections contracted by insect bites. 

5 days later with my health still in tact, I can now confirm that there was absolutely nothing to worry about and that I'm a drama queen (typical). It was an amazing day, and Az showed me around acres of farm, forest, and beauty. 

ATVing through the plantation 

Apart from the dead marine-life overload, the Gallagher's showed me an absolutely amazing time, and it is an experience I'm confident can never be replicated. Some other highlights of my stay are getting to go to a deserted sand kay out in the middle of the ocean, swimming with a shark, seeing an amazing concert by Busby Marou, and having frequent fires/picnics on the beach. 

Deserted Sand Kay

I should win an award for holding that thing

Sunrise

Getting to take a look into the lives of a family completely different than my own was definitely one of my most interesting and enjoyable abroad experiences. 

Stay tuned for my next blog, which will probs be the last one.

-F 

I am the only English speaking person in this country

For those of you who know me well, you can easily picture the blank faced look of confusion I make when something is said that I don’t understand. I will be the first to admit that this isn’t exactly my best look, however, since I consider myself one step short of a genius, it is not a look I have to make all too often. 

Or at least that was the case- until I got to Australia. I first complained to you all about trying to understand the Asian-Australian accent. That was a struggle, and still is, but what I had failed to mention to you is that I couldn’t exactly understand any of the real Australians either. Every time an Australian spoke to me, it would take about thirty seconds of processing, and once I finally registered what they were saying, I’d then have to formulate a half-coherent answer as quickly as possible to make up for my thirty- second gap of deciphering their previous statement. I’m sure many wondered “does she have a social disorder, or maybe the IQ of 2?” But I was doing the best that I could, and I hoped that within a few weeks of living here I’d adjust.

It is now four months later, and instead of settling in and things getting easier on the communication front, it has gone horribly downhill.  The more I have immersed myself here, the more I have come to the conclusion that these people simply do not speak English.

This theory was somewhat confirmed when my PR teacher was kind enough to sit me down one day before class and explain to me that I should not be concerned about my utter lack of understanding because he and everyone else spoke Australian, which was not interchangeable with civilized English. What does Australian entail that our English does not? Well I will tell you.

Australians are the laziest creatures on this earth when it comes to speaking. They have shortened virtually every word past five letters making it so that full sentences can consist of purely one syllable words. It’s somewhat similar to how I envision cavemen communicating. I'll give you a few examples:

Breakfast- Brekky

Tutorial (same as recitation)- Tute

Avocado- Avo

Afternoon- Arv

Instead of typing “Bye” I get an “x”

Melbourne- Melbs

University- Uni

And then there are those various words and phrases that are just flat out different than anything you’d hear back in the US. I have taken it upon myself for the sake of this blog post to not only translate for you all, but to also insert my personal feedback in regards to my perceived adequacy or inadequacy of these sayings. 

“How are you going?” – Can I help you with anything? Oftentimes used by store clerks to ask if you need anything. It can also be used for how are you? Why this phrase sucks- you would never say “I am going well.” You would say “things are going well” or “I am well.” Overall, "how are you going" just sounds entirely wrong, and it is grammatically incorrect. 

“Are you keen?” – “Would you like to do this/Do you want to?” Keen is one of those words that I can only envision my great Irish Grandmother using. And even then, I’m convinced that using this word would be considered unfashionable and outdated.

“Hey”- You know you are in Australia when every sentence out of someone’s mouth has the word “hey” randomly inserted into it. No occasion is needed for a hey and after observing, I’ve concluded that people will typically throw it in once every 5-7 words thus contributing to the fact that it has no official meaning. Hey is often tacked onto the end of a sentence, somewhat like the Canadian “eh,” but I have also heard it used it as a replacement for “what/what did you say/are you up for this?”

Another cultural aspect of Australia that links into their questionable communication skills is the overall lack of a filter these people have. On my spring break I went on a guided tour around the natural wonders in a town called Cairns. The tour guide immediately announced that he’d buy me a free shot of tequila at lunch if I “flashed my tits,” (I obviously did no such thing) and proceeded to spend the rest of the tour talking way too much about  “orgasms, penises, sex,” and every other topic you were taught never to bring up in public. “Captain Matty” as they called him, informed me that I didn’t look slutty enough to be a stripper (um, thanks?) and warned me never to bang the diving instructors in Cairns (because that was the first thing on my list to do) among many other inappropriate references.  Did I mention that this was the number one recommended tour to take in the entire city of Cairns? This is casual dinner talk as far as Auzzies go, and as much as I reject the influence that living in the South has had on me because living in Chapel Hill hardly counts, my inner southern bell really shined through as I sat there squirming with discomfort every time he opened his mouth. 

I will send you all off with a few random terms/phrases here that are literally nowhere to be found in the US. You can thank me later (preferably via Starbucks giftcards) for educating you.

Fairy floss: Cotton Candy

Playsuit: Romper

Capsicum: Pepper

Larriken: Troublesome young man

Bogan: Hick

Togs: Bathing suit

Thongs: Flip flops

Now that I have given you a brief foreign language lesson on how to communicate with Australians, I am off to spend my last 3 remaining weeks in Australia. I'll be in Sydney, Melbourne, and Cairns... then back to Chapel Hill I come (everyone try hard to contain your excitement). 

I also feel the need to show you pictures of a restaurant famous in Australia called Max Brenner's chocolate bar, which is dedicated purely to chocolate. 

White chocolate cookie shake

Milk chocolate home-made icecream with pecans, brownies, melted milk chocolate, and chocolate waffle balls

Mom and dad- prepare for the medical bills associated with diabetes

 

Until next time.

-F